41 thoughts on “SNARK WEEK RECAP: North & South Book II, Episode 1

  1. Southern Blonde looks familiar… is she played by the actress who was ‘Ginny’ on General Hospital, many moons ago?

    1. Southern Blonde is Genie Francis who played Laura (of “Luke and Laura” fame).

      She’s also married to Number One (Jonathan Frakes — because they met and fell in love filming the first N&S miniseries!) :-)

      I know way too much about these two (I don’t count #3) series because I was obsessed with them as a teenager/young adult!

      1. I wrote almost the same thing because I hadn’t seen your comment. I’ve been watching General Hospital since I was about ten and still do! Laura is now the mayor of Port Charles and I’m just in love with William Ryker so I’m a fan also.

    2. Genie Francis. Played Laura (of Luke and Laura fame) on General Hospital. She’s married to Jonathon Frakes (number one) and I wonder if this is where they met.

  2. Why am I picturing Tits Out as an old woman versuon in Book 3?

    I hope Worth’s ghost gets his revenge.

  3. Yeah, at the top, because we’re recapping who the characters are from the first series massive eyeroll And yes, this thing totally DOES romanticize the Confederacy & the Lost Cause South, so let’s take the piss out of it.

  4. Mercifully for him, Swayze can no longer be embarrassed by all this, although he probably just collected his paycheck and moved on. Genie Francis in married to Jonathan Frakes of “Star Trek” fame. And Alley can’t be held responsible because she’s another victim of Scientology.

  5. I don’t “believe” North and South is an ode to the Confederacy, I am recapping what is happening in the show and adding my thoughts about that. I didn’t write plot points with Confederate soldiers saying essentially “I’m not fighting for slavery, I’m fighting for the Southern way of life,” the scriptwriter/filmmakers did. Don’t get all testy at me for accurately picking up on what they’re throwing down.

  6. Oh boy! I have very vague memories of the first one from my childhood. This series did not age well at all. Poor Patrick Swayze, so handsome, but that hair! Whenever I think of this series, all I remember is Patrick Swazye in a uniform and sporting a mulllet. I was quite surprised to see Number One (who always looks great with a beard) in this and poor Jean Simmons in that hideous Southern Mom get up. I’m pretty sure that Irene Cara portrays the slave, but she’s not listed on IMDB. Northern Mom looked so familiar to me…she’s the actress who played the housekeeper on Benson! I can’t wait for the other recaps to see who’s who in bad costumes. This is a snark-worthy choice for sure!

      1. I was coming on here to say this. Strangely enough, they both played the same role in “Fame”; Irene Cara in the movie, and Erica Gimpel in the TV series.

    1. Earlier in her career, Northern Mom– Inga Swenson– played Helen Keller’s mother in THE MIRACLE WORKER opposite Anne Bancroft and Patty Duke.

    2. Dear god–that’s Jean Simmons?! I love Jean Simmons. (But presumably even much loved actresses with actual skills need to eat as they age.) And this does look like a fabulous ’80s giggle feast.

  7. I have to say, coming to this without enough coffee (yes, it’s twenty to seven in the evening here, shh) and expecting it to be about the Elizabeth Gaskell novel is quite something. That’s a lot of décolletage.

  8. Great job, as usual, and I salute your bravery!

    But WTF was that “shitty extra” in the foreground of that shot wearing around her head?

    A “let’s get physical” headband? Bandages? A blindfold so she didn’t have to look at Slutty Brunette’s sequined whooore red gown?

    Looking forward to the later installments of this!

    1. Haha I actually had trouble focusing on the paragraph above it because I kept getting distracted trying to figure out what was going on there!

  9. The costumes are mostly awful and some of the color choices seem wrong to me, but I’m no expert.

  10. Short sleeves are actually fine on a (young) teenage girl in the 1860s. The fabric, fan front on the bodice and wanna be fichu thing, along with the bonnet, are however, made of whimsical fuckery.

    Also, is anyone else getting serious “Scarlett O’Hara’s curtain dress” vibes from Slutty Brunette’s red velvet ensamble?

  11. I keep confusing Tits Out with other characters who have their tits out. How do you keep track of them, Kendra?

  12. Maybe you should assign other monikers to the damsels who are displaying excess decolletage (sp) so readers can tell them apart. I am offering the name “Boobs A Lot” to be assigned as you wish.

  13. And as for Slutty Brunette, I am amazed by how the costumer got Southern Belle and Renaissance Maiden together in one dress, accessorized by that oversize crappy looking Edwardian belt thing with the poor sad little bow on it. Ugly trifecta for the (not)win. But I did enjoy looking at Patrick Swayzes perfect jawline. . . .

  14. I do appreciate you slogging through this mini series, it must be painful! Fun fact, when the crew traveled to Virginia to film dirty dancing, Swayze stirred up a ruckus because all the Southern ladies recognized him from this series.

  15. I think we’re finally getting to the parts I vaguely remember! I didn’t put together that it was a multi-season thing at the time. Also somehow I guess I missed a lot of the one sister’s sleeping around. Just as well. Your recaps are much more fun than trying to slog it out again.

    Poor Jean Simmons in that awful dress.. I mean, it doesn’t look well fitted, either. Like some others, too talented for this drivel.

  16. Kendra, I love your work, and I’m compelled to admit I went to prom in a double of Slutty Brunette’s red party dress. Except mine had full length sleeves. It was 1987, I had no choice.

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